Jenna Fischer cute smile dog sweaterOver the last week, or so, I’ve been getting bombarded with spam messages by way of the contact form I have on the sidebar of this here website.  It’s a nice fail-safe, in that it doesn’t present my actual email address to the sender (unless I respond, obviously), but I have it set so that I DO get the messages sent to me by email.  Since switching to and putting it on my site, I’ve received ONE legitimate message through that form, but by golly it was a grand one.  I like that my readers can get in touch with me outside of just commenting on posts, so I didn’t want to get rid of this contact form, but what to do about all of this spam, though?

Well, after mistakenly being under the impression that it didn’t, I discovered that WordPress actually keeps a record of all messages sent to me through my contact form.  I knew that I could mark post comments as spam, to allow for the improvement of Akismet’s filter services, but I didn’t realize that I could do it with these, too.  For those of you who are users and might not be in the know, I’ll save you a few web-clicks: on your site’s Dashboard left-side menu, look for Feedback, then select the Feedback sub-menu option.  BAM, that’s it.  From there, you can mark messages sent through contact forms as spam… and now you can think of me whenever you do so.

I had 400+ messages in this folder; I was getting emails in waves of 15-25 over the span of an hour, but I didn’t get emails for every message – I think it just gave up a few times during the bombardments.  After spam-marking the lot of these messages, I seem to be better off (the contact form gets to live!  …and the people rejoiced.), but some of these messages were rather entertaining to me, so aside from sharing valuable WordPress tips and sexy/cute Jenna Fischer imagery with you, let me illuminate your weary mind on this Monday afternoon with a selection of wise words as offered to me by my spammers…

“wonderful issues alhteetogr” – From now on, I’m yelling “AllTEETogur!” in a French accent when I’m excited.

“Wow wow .wow” – My reaction when my daily Random Beauty pops up through its Twitter feed.

“My proeblm was a wall until I read this, then I smashed it.” – Mark Mushakian, a solver of problems.  Bonus fun-fact: this message was sent from an Out of the Box entry.. maybe he’s my spammer!?

“…I will definitely have to bump this up my tbr! ” – Kinky?

“In a Sense- UGG Boots Outlet Are Great Choice…” – And it continues on for over 1,100 more words.

“…can you plaese send me an email: or call ([actual phone number-Mark])? Unfortunately, I cannot send you a message through this blog!” – Thanks for sending me a message so that I know you can’t send me a message, Thanyptang.

“KEL!!!! I love your year in review! It’s fbluaous! Love the pics! Love the music with the pics! Love seeing Katherine at the barn! Love seeing them at C’ville! Love seeing Lauren! And the girls and you at her wedding!” – My name is not Kel, this was not from a year-in-review post, there was no music, I do not know a Katherine, I’ve never been to C’ville, and I was not at Lauren’s wedding.

“You Sir/Madam are the enemy of confusion evrhewryee!” – Please note, dear readers: not being certain whether I am a man or a woman will make you my enemy.

“Oh, lover, yes. Yes, yes you, me, us, strike, storke, taste.You fill my hunger and leave me gasping for air.Thank you, thank you, thank you you beautiful sexy god. Here, now, I need you I’m too desperate to wait another moment.” – Kinky Part II?

“I ran into your mom at the dentist today. She told me about your biusness.”  – What my mom be tellin’ you ’bout my biusness for, Olga??

“science, n. the intellectual and priacatcl activity encompassing the systematic study of the structure and behavior of the physical and natural world through observation and experiment. (Oxford American Dictionary)” – Priacatcly informative!

“Fascinating blog! Is your theme custom made or did you dolwnoad it from somewhere? A design like yours with a few simple adjustements would really make my blog stand out. Please let me know where you got your theme. Thank you” – This one might be genuine…

“Well I guess I don’t have to spend the weekend fiurnigg this one out!” – It’s perfect fiurnigging weather, though.

“Sweet December starts with a sweet post.” – From an entry posted in January.

“Thank you for sharing surpeb informations. Your website is very cool.” – Obviously.


About Mark Mushakian

Just a man who loves God, women, kids, dogs, movies, and every other lovely thing in life :)
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One Response to Spam-a-lama-ding-dong

  1. Pingback: Yet Another Blog Post About Spam | Offical Blog of Scott David Brown

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